Thursday, December 07, 2006

God Advertises Beyond Billboard


I love those billboards that quote God. They appear more often in the South, just like Waffle House signs. While on a road trip to Florida, God spoke to me from above – on a 30-sheet billboard, to be exact. Since then I’ve kept a list of his wise words and also started drafting new ones with some friends (Jason, Emily - bless you). Below are the words of God. Keep an eye out when on the road. And remember, buckle up!

“Have you read my #1 bestseller? There will be a test.”
“Hamburger for dinner on Friday? Have fun in hell.”
“When I call you up, it won’t be on the telephone.”
“Your crazy ex-girlfriend isn’t the only one watching your every move.”
“We need to talk.”
“You know that ‘love thy neighbor’ thing? I meant it.”
“Here Easter bunny, bunny, bunny…Remember when Easter was about ME?!!”
“Follow me.”
“Pontius Pilot never flew an airplane.”
“Where else is bread and wine on the house every day?”
“Knock, knock.” (Who’s there?) “Hallow.” (Hello who?) “Hallow be my name.”
“I can make a blind man see. Can you?”
"Turn here for guidance."
(Achoo!) “Bless Me.”
“I’ll be back.”_- Arnold Schwarzenegger – God
“The real Supreme Court meets up here.”

No comments: